Step 6(a): Integration and Practice of a New Mindset – A Little Story of “The Flip-Back”

Life got in the way. It often does. And with it, came a whole range of default patterns that, up until today, I did not even realize were trying to re-establish a space within me. But I had made a commitment to myself: I was re-focusing, re-energizing, and re-imagining my life square in the realm of authenticity. What did it mean to express myself authentically? Well, to get there, I first had to take a moment to really think about “The Flip-Back.”

I was first introduced to the phenomenon in about week 5 of my own journey towards Peaceful Parenting. As we establish new patterns in our brain – neural connections that are supportive, loving, peaceful, and empathetic to ourselves and to those around us – the old patterns struggle to find a place to exist. You know, all of the work we are doing is akin to evicting the stuff we have been living with from the rooms upon rooms that make up our lived realities in our own minds. And as they cry out to be heard, the power of the years of service they have provided in making us who we are today give them one last opportunity to move back in. But I was also taught that this phenomenon – as real as it feels – is not “real.” What is “real” is the new pattern… the one we are trying to make habitual… the thoughts and ideas that we are exchanging with the old patterns so as to become supportive and peaceful people in all aspects of our world.

Maybe we need an example to begin to “get there from here”:

I am currently embarking on a new lifestyle and career choice. I love what I do, and I have loved it for some time. But in the position I love, my leadership potential remains stunted. It is just that: “potential.” But I am actively working to activate that potential and turn it into stories of success. The Quantum Mindshift Meditation has taught me that I am a natural born leader… so why do I remain stunted? Or, maybe the issue is that I was reading this all wrong. My job provides me with security, benefits, stability. But not leadership in the way that the Natural Born Leader inside of me would feel comfortable settling for. And as I focused on all of these compete ideas, the opportunity to take the leap into leadership arose. Deep in my teachings and fully aware of what this possibility meant to my activation of authentic leadership, I followed through.

But wait a second… what about the security and stability? Was I really going to give all that up for the potential let down of not becoming the leader I think I can be? Was I really ready to do everything that this leadership role requires? I mean… I can work with some people, and I have success (of sorts) in my current position, but I don’t know if I can “really” call that “Leadership” per say… Maybe I should slow this down and look more closely at what I am throwing away here. Maybe I’m not ready. Maybe I’m not a “Natural Bon Leader” after all.

And that’s when it hit me! The Flip-Back was in full effect!! These worries and fears… they were not “real” because they were not expressions of my authentic self. Rather, they were expressions of my fears and limiting beliefs. Nothing more, and nothing less. And when I considered my most ardent supporters and when I flipped through my CV to consider more objectively whether or not I was qualified for a leadership position, I realized that I most certainly was – not only on paper, but also in my spirit.

So I thanked my limiting beliefs for reminding me of who I really am: A Natural Born Leader. I thanked my limiting beliefs for allowing me to revisit the uncomfortable space from which I used to operate, and step back with even more strength into the space I had held for my new belief.

I went “there.” And now I am here in all my authenticity.

A Natural Born Leader in all her authenticity.

With love, light, & healing,

Laura Mae.

 

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